Recently, a Fox News host commented on a clip that featured former VP Kamala Harris and her husband, Doug Emhoff, together at a grocery store. The anchor wondered, to all of his Fox viewers, "What kind of husband goes grocery shopping with his wife?" I'm sure you are answering that question in your head right now with all the sensible real-world, mundane ways that you know are reasons for a husband to shop for groceries with his wife. There are also, of course, the answers having to do with sexism, misogyny, homophobia, etc... but I think because of who asked this unfortunate question it should be considered first through the filter of one's wallet.
According to my amateur Googling, this particular Fox anchor is a married, white, male, multi-millionaire. He cheated on his first wife with his former producer, who still works at Fox. (So much for traditional Fox family values and his standing for commenting on appropriate husband-wife dynamics.) She became his second wife and they have children together. Based on their home and the clothes they wear and their combined salaries, they appear to be more than comfortable. His targets, Harris & Emhoff, are also very well off. All parties involved exist on a financial level that many of us only dream about.
Doug Emhoff, the former Second Gentleman, with all his notoriety and wealth, went grocery shopping in public with his wife anyway. It astounded the Fox anchor who revealed, with his question, that he wouldn’t be caught dead doing such a thing. To witness a person so out of touch with how grocery shopping happens in America begs the question - what intoxicating social cachet is absorbed by the very wealthy when not shopping for your own groceries makes one holier-than-thou? Even with the rise of food delivery services, this is the type of rarefied air common folk don’t breathe.
What we average Americans must remember when we watch network news is that we are being talked at by very wealthy people who were made that way by ads that, ironically, tell you what to buy at the grocery store. This anchor thought he was signaling camaraderie in the boring, old-hat ways that are supposed to make a stereotypical Fox viewer feel reinforced and correct, but I think the question that was really bubbling under the surface was, “What kind of person has to go grocery shopping? Ick!”
He may have been trying to blow a tired dog whistle with his choice, but by shaming husbands with the inference that grocery shopping is not for them, he gave a gut-punch to capitalism. In 2022 about 45% of the 165 million American males counted themselves as married. This anchor casually scoffed at the economic opportunity married men represent to their local grocery stores. If he truly wanted to pump the American Dream he would be encouraging every single member of the family to go to the grocery store together. The store would then have maximum opportunities to advertise in real time to more people - more in-person wallets and impulsivity.
Perhaps in the future the anchor would do better to encourage family days at grocery stores where you get special deals based on whether you bring your spouse and kids along. Or maybe he could host his show from a different grocery store now and then and really talk it up. Pay the deli to cater for the crew. Point out how the blood pressure cuff works back at the pharmacy to help people take responsibility for their health. Run a man-on-the-street interview segment in the aisles asking “What's an affordable meal that helps you make ends meet?” He could consider being useful to the average family and the stores they depend on.
What kind of husband goes grocery shopping with his wife? The kind who wants to keep in touch with pricing trends for one of the biggest chunks of the family budget. The kind who wants to vote with his wallet. The kind who wants to see what might inspire him to cook something that could broaden his family’s culinary horizons, thus giving his children rudimentary common ground for future conversations with potential employers from around the world. The kind who seeks opportunities to model real-world skills for his children and teach them how to be savvy consumers, thus better protecting the legacy of their inheritance. The kind who welcomes the chance to network with people in his neighborhood. The kind who wants his local grocery store to flourish so that on the days when he does want to just have it all delivered, he is deeply familiar with a rock-solid local store to help him host an amazing lunch for a potential business partner.
The host who threw this dart of a question made a choice that was, quite simply, bad for America’s economic engine and a waste of his platform.